Silent night

Lost for words.
A silent rendition of the mute;
I find my thoughts don’t
Translate into sounds anymore.

A cacophony of images
That collides; within
The confines of my mind,
But to no avail or significance.

A silent scream of perpetuity
Lost in my sore throat;
Hoarse from yester-prayers
That belie my hidden emotions.

Random thoughts swirl in
A mix of truth and what ifs.
My mind reels; in the confusion
Of mind games in flux.

Words escape me
When my mind is made up
Of mush and melancholy;
But for what… eludes me.

Suffer in silence,
When all around is the din
Of glass shard after thoughts
And missed promises.

A new dawn beckons,
In the morn of hindsight.
For retrospection brings
Fortitude and dysfunction.

Tomorrow perhaps brings
Recollection of my mindset;
For mine voice to fly free
Like a long-caged mynæ in heat.

What do the words
Mean when cognizance is
But forsaken in light of
Misguided half-truths and misdemeanors?

Since silence dogs me;
Like half-bred English
Or forgotten day-old nestlings
Gawking in the cruelty of grim realization.

But then the quiet, quaking
Bud blooms in solitude.
To spread its moist petals outwards
Seductively revealing a teat raison.

Words elude my conscious
Being in surrender;
Wither the nest egg of
Promise offers release or comfort?

I am but what I deem
Within each struggling breath
The choices long made to reasons;
Never explored but made in pithy acceptance.

Hark say I to the
Echoes of past sins long forgotten –
Take me into thy sacred bosom
For feminine warmth and devotion.

What can be made
Of these words, that
Seemingly slip off an iced tongue
Like a dew drop on a blade of grass.

Fathomless depths
Implore me to jump to
The shadowy wings; for perhaps
Within those depths lie redemption.

And the sound of my inner vice.
My release,
My thunder,
My reconciliation…